You see, recently I got an email from one of the Resistance, telling me about the challenges they faced with ADHD as they worked to overcome it. This member of the Resistance had systems in place, but found they struggled with procrastination and getting the big things done. It sucks to know that you’ve got all the right things in place on paper, but there’s some invisible thing that you’re missing to make it all come together. Here’s some of the thoughts I shared with her.
Coping with ADHD can be exactly that – just coping. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
And what’s missing is an outcome based perspective.
One of the fundamental elements of living with ADHD that gets overlooked all too often is the perspective required to make the systems work. I don’t care if you’ve got a ‘Rockstar Productivity System’ or a ‘Ninja’s Approach To Getting Things Done’ – if you don’t have a reason to do them, all you have is an endless list and not a lot of meaning.
So let’s change that. Let’s talk about the ideas that make a difference, and stop you from just Coping with ADHD and help you to start Overcoming ADHD.
The Steps You Take To Get Sh*t Done Are Not Sexy
Cooking a healthy meal, investing the money you earn, building a business or training until you want to pass out - none of the steps you take as you do any of these things are sexy, regardless of what you’re told. You will not feel elated as you eat chicken and salad for the 30th time, put 50% of what you earn into a savings account, work an extra hour instead of going out or tear your muscles in an effort to build them up. The steps, in and of themselves, are not sexy.
But the more you do follow the steps, the sexier the results that you get are.
So what’s stopping you from following the steps? The art of avoidance as we search for something to do that excites us, short circuiting our hunt for meaning and replacing it with a short burst of excitement. This hunt is known as Procrastination.
A New View Of Procrastination
Repeat with me - Procrastination Isn’t A State, It’s An Outcome. And We Can Get A Different Outcome By Tweaking The Input.
Procrastination is what stops Coping with ADHD becoming Living with ADHD. It can come on for a whole range of reasons – maybe you think you’ll fail, maybe you don’t know why you’re doing something, or maybe you just think that it’s all pointless – and stop you from achieving those big goals you want to hit. All the concerns listed are valid, but until you can act on them they’re just ideas in the ether. And there’s no point letting a ghost of your imagination stop you.
Here’s the thing. If you fail, you learn. It won’t be comfortable, but in the future it’ll give you sexier results.
And if you don’t know what you’re doing, start by asking yourself ‘What excites me?’ or ’What do I want to achieve with this?’ Being able to answer these question will give you the Moral you need to push through.
My favourite parable on this is here, and my favourite quote on purpose as motivation is by Napoleon:
“Even in war Moral Power is to Physical as three parts out of four”
The Point Of Purpose
If you don’t have purpose, you’ll struggle to have motivation. And without motivation, you are now coping with ADHD instead of overcoming it. A purpose doesn’t have to be “changing the world” level either – it can be as simple as getting something done because you want to see what results you get, or getting more done than you did yesterday.
And finally, if you think that it’s all pointless… you could well be right. But hey, we’re only here for 80 odd years so why not make the most of them? Why spend a minute wondering “Why bother?” when you could spend a minute doing something that excites
you?
Side note - The reason I train in Muay Thai and Krav Maga is because I was interested in them. The reason I do my Wednesday hell sessions is because I want to see if I can do it, and because I want to challenge myself. That’s my purpose.
Reality Is Negotiable
And Finally, Reality Is Negotiable And You Can Set The Rules
It’s something that I had to hear a thousand times before I could really accept it. I heard it from Tim Ferriss, Steve Jobs, Randy Komisar, Oren Klaff, and Derek Sivers amongst others, but I’ve only really learned to understand this by challenging myself, as I’ve written above.
I can’t begin to tell you what an influence this one perspective alone has had on my life. Without it I wouldn’t have looked at Entrepreneurial ventures, I wouldn’t be married and I wouldn’t have gone off medication.
When you change the game, you set the rules.
